Blue-eyed Death

When I was small and living in the same room as the epic rattlesnake fiasco I had a nightmare.  Explanations are here if you want them 

http://kellcait.blogspot.com/2010/09/great-rattlesnake-adventure.html

In this nightmare I was sucked down into the world of ‘Where the Wild Things Are’ but there were no Wild Things.  There was only awful things and terrible things.  I had a sneaking suspicion that the Wild Things had wisely left the place because it was the most horrible environment ever.  Luckily, I was there with the Care Bears, who had also somehow been sucked down into this miserable pit of despair that was empty of Wild Things and hope.  Unluckily, we were walking through a dark and scary tunnel while Brave-heart Lion explained the science behind why we would never escape and I was trapped here forever.

This was an extra slice of horrible in my 6 year old mind.  I had been waiting for my entire life to meet that Care Bears and it was not going at all how I had planned.  None of the other kids had had to deal with these shenanigans when the Care Bears came to help them.  This was not fair.  I was panicking while Cheer Bear and Lots-a-Heart Bear tried to calm me down.  They assured me we would live happily in the scary cave of darkness and my Mommy wouldn’t be sad forever because I was gone.  All I could think was the Care Bears could never replace my parents, and that if they really cared they would call a cloud car and we would all fly out of this mess.  Then, quite suddenly, I woke up.

I was so relieved that it was a dream.  I always wanted to live with the Care Bears, but in the clouds, not in the Wild Things lands; especially not when the Wild Things weren’t even there to keep the scary stuff away and I had to stay in a cave forever.  I rolled over to get comfortable again, eyeing my stuffed blue Care Bear with suspicion.  That’s when I saw them.

The Most Terrifying Eyes Ever.

They were blue and they were peering through the gap in the Venetian blinds.  I could see his tan fingers pulling the slats apart so that he (I just knew it was a he, a girl would never do anything shocking and horrifying as this) could peer through with his huge, blue, bloodshot eyes.  I started screaming and didn’t stop.  I screamed with fervor.  I screamed like a Twilight fan would if a real vampire ever came into their lives.  I screamed like Gaston when he fell off the castle.  I screamed like I had never screamed before and never will again.

I was pressed myself back against the wall, screaming, wondering why my mother and father weren’t coming to chase the horrible blue eyes away.  In hindsight I'm wondering why I didn't move 6 inches to the left and go out the door.  My 6 year old brain didn't think of that, instead, in between waves of panic it just repeated 'Surely they can hear me, perhaps mom and dad are mad at me for almost living with the care bears'.

The blue eyes paralyzed me.

They skewered me through the blinds.  I became convinced I was going to die from the blue watching eyes staring at me.

Then my mom shook me awake and told me it was time for school.  I have never been so relieved to be actually awake ever.  What I did not know that morning was that I had developed a new fear.  To this day, I have an irrational fear of Venetian blinds.  That’s right, as a 22 year old adult, I still maneuver my sleeping space to be out of the line of sight whenever these blinds are in my life.  I just know that once I go to sleep, even though the blinds are inside the window and it is physically impossible for someone to reach through the window and pull apart the blinds to look at me to death, that someone will. Someone with blue eyes the size of solo cups.